If you want to have fun join a senior golf group. There will be no shortage of laughter.
Recently Raintree Country Club Senior men golfers gathered for our annual meeting. Before the auspicious occasion started, senior golfers were softened up with high-test coffee and muffins.
Our President, sitting at a table with a portable podium, alongside the Vice-President, Secretary and Treasurer, opened this very official looking meeting with the same greeting he uses in his email blasts to the group. “Gentlemen!.”
I haven’t figured out if “Gentlemen!” is a statement of fact or a prayer request.
One of the items on the agenda was a change in the by-laws, which had been emailed for our perusal prior to the meeting. I guy sitting directly behind me whispered to his buddies, “I know they are going to bitch but I’m going to do it anyway.” He was right. When the President asked for comments/discussion this brave soul said, “There is a grammatical error which needs our attention.” He proceeded to read the error and offer a substitute. As he anticipated, the crowd of senior golfers hissed and groaned and moaned at the grammar police. “I knew, I knew,” he said, “they were going to bitch slap me.”
Everybody roared with laughter.
Now that the official business was over, the meeting was ready to be adjourned, so we could go out and play a round of golf. But before the motion to adjourn could be made, a senior golfer asked if he could speak. Walking up to the podium, the tall golfer with an English accent, said, “I know there are things we Senior golfers like to do besides play golf.” He paused for dramatic effect. “Like drink and have sex.” Once again everybody roared with laughter. Then he said, “I’m singing in a Christmas musical and I’d love for you to come to it.”
Bitch-slapped, drinking, sex, and a Christmas musical. Welcome to Senior golf!
By the way, Raintree Senior men golfers won the city championship this year. As they say, “if it’s true, it ain’t braggin’.”