You Are Not Going To Believe How Stupid I Am (Or Maybe You Will)


You are not going to believe how stupid I am (or maybe you will).  I am a disgrace to my Southern heritage, which, for the record, I’m not really into.

Last night I had a craving for one of my favorite foods, pinto beans.  Please don’t mess them up with onions and please mash a few of them up and make them soupy.

Well, you can’t have pinto beans without cornbread.  I looked in the cupboard and saw some yellow cornbread mix.  Not good for pintos.  Too sweet.  Good for chili but not pintos.  So I looked again and found a container with white cornbread mix.  Only problem, it wasn’t white cornbread mix.  Stupid me didn’t realize it was grits.  Yes, grits!

Who would eat that stuff?  Answer: my wife and some guests we’ve had in our house.  But not me.  I hate grits.  The texture of grits makes it seem like you are eating sand.  Awful.

Anyway, I added buttermilk to the grits, still thinking I was using cornbread mix, and dropped some of the concoction in a frying pan.  I thought it looked weird.  And it was weird.  I tasted the mystery food and then the light went off.  Grits!

And so I admitted my stupidity and ate my humble pie.

It wouldn’t be a bad thing for Donald Trump to eat some humble pie.  Bet he’s never eaten any of that pie.  You can tell by the way he talks.

Have you eaten any humble pie?

Have you dealt with stupid things you’ve done in your life?

May the stupid things you do teach you humility. May the stupid things you do have the least amount of consequences for you and those your stupidity impacts.  If your stupidity causes great harm to you and/or others, may you receive forgiveness from them and from yourself.



Pray This Prayer With Me: The Dead or Dying Time

praying hands1reduced


For some of us it’s the dead or dying time, which is the time when a lot of our loved ones are either dead or dying.

It’s difficult.  It’s depressing.  It’s agonizing.

We are grateful for life, but understand if we would have drawn up life differently than you created it to be.

There’s not much else to say or pray.



Hey Republican Conservative Christians, Where Are Your Scissors? (Think Thomas Jefferson)

Hey Republican Christians, where are your scissors?

scissors old

If you listen to Republican Christians you would think all the founding fathers think just like them.  Makes you wonder if they ever heard of Thomas Jefferson.

thomas jefferson

I’m in Washington, D.C. to officiate at a wedding and I’m finding myself particularly grateful for Thomas Jefferson.   Jefferson, unlike today’s Republican Christians, did not claim to follow or believe all the Bible.  In fact, Jefferson, in his senior years, took a razor and cut out parts of the gospels which he didn’t agree.  OK, he didn’t use scissors.  You got me.  But, Jefferson did use the razor generously.

Jefferson’s condensed Bible excluded all miracles by Jesus and most mentions of the supernatural, including sections of the four gospels which contain the Resurrection and passages indicating Jesus was divine.

thomas jefferson Bible

Doesn’t sound anything at all like today’s conservative Christian Republicans!

There are things in the Bible which need to be ignored.  I don’t recommend using scissors or a razor to cut those texts out, but I do think it’s extremely important to be honest about the Bible.  And honesty requires admitting that some parts of the Bible are reprehensible and not worthy of our belief or practice.   What I find disturbing in the Bible is not the same as Jefferson’s list but like Jefferson I recognize the health of the world is connected to world religions critiquing their scripture.